Cause I'm so sick of working, so Tired here, So Done wiTh thInkiNG liFe could Start heRe!

Dear...Dear...Dear...

Well, and here I am feeling so sick cause I am really sick..
I've got a cold..with teary eyes, running nose and everything.
I need a few days off...I cant have that cause a few people are on vacation so...
I..a sick girl have to come to work until 11 PM everyday.
How cool is that?

The worse thing is no one ask me how I'm doing cause they know I'm way too sick to work and if they ask me they have to send me home to rest.
Moreover, my boss, a smart, MATURE, Gay guy decided to go nuts on all the staff now.
He believes we had way tooo much free time and dont work hard enough.
Well, will I be sick and pathetic like this if I dont work hard staying in the sun all day?..... What a MORON!
I cant have some rest for that? I mean what kind of sweat shop is that!
It doesn't look healthy at all. Don't you think?
I mean...I have to deal with oh-so-VIP guests everyday and I sneeze every six seconds. How Four Seasons Standard is that...
What if they got a flu from me and decided to file a lawsuit against the hotel...
That's their fault then.

OK the thing is this illness of mine enlighten me.
I realize that I dont belong here at all.
Oh how I struggle to belong.
No matter how hard I try, I'll never fit in.
I fell like I was tossed into the Khing River with no life jacket while everyone is watching on the river bank waiting to yell at me when I swim too slow or too fast.

I dont have friends, no someone special, no proper medication, no entertainment here whatsoever.
I dont think I can make any friends here. They are way too different from me.
I dont know how to open my heart to these people...I really dont.
All I can do here is work work work, stressed out,got myself sick and then back to work again.
That's the only thing you can do here.
In short...there is no life in SOB RAUK.
There's no way I or anyone with the same life perspective can start a life here.
It's the dead end. The end of the world, if there's one, will surely starts here.
Maybe.. just maybe the end of the world is probably started here already, for weeks and weeks. Noone knows that because they are way to caught up with themselves and thier 'career'!

I had enough now. I mean it. I'll send new application to many places real soon.
I dont know how long it will take to get pity ass out of here.
All I know is this time I'll make sure my new job will be in a civilize city.
Wish me luck...I really need luck and my good health soon.
If I have to survive this lousy place, good health and encouragement is needed quick!

Amp
with red running nose, swollen teary eyes, swollen and not so pretty face and tired and so darn unhappy heart =(