Knowing Me!

The best way to know others is to know yourself.
That's nice! Someone should quote that one. Seriously!!
I come up with this self-learning "technique" a few days ago.
The best way to know what I really want is to get to know myself thoroughly.
I ask people...lots and lots of people about lots and lots of thing.
Their responses and suggestions are great.
But then again none of those great advices works for my situation.
That's why I, Amy, will be the one who answer all the questions I have by myself!
(I know smart people probably figure that out ages ago. Have I not tell you I'm dull!)
O.K! Let's get it started, shall we?O.K. I'll start the self-learning process here!Hmm...Hmm...Any idea where to start?Darn it!!!
I should know where to start!! Gosh..this is my life.
Who would understand me more than myself! Danm!
O.K. Again! I will start my getting to know me thing here!

1. My name is Suvichaya Rerkshanandana or Amp.
I like to be called Amy R. Shanan or Amy.
In fact, some of my friends know me as Amy which is kinna cool. I like it!

2. I'm 167 cms. heigh and weight 59 kgs.
I don't like my height and my weight.
I wish I could be a little bit taller says 3 cms more and 5 kgs less.
In order to achieve my ideal weight goal, I am now back to my diet routine!! I hope to reach the goal asap like in a month. Wish me luck!
(I just finished eating fat full candy! Amy you need to focus!!)

3. I am Thai. OK. This is a rather serious stuff. If you don't dig serious stuff pass it.
There are many narrow-minded people from Western world see us as "The Sin City."
They associate the word Thai with postitutetion, sex, crime, pollution, theft etc.
I fell sorry for them actually. They miss the beautiful side of my country.
They would never get the oppotunity to appreciate these beauty if they don't open their mind. But again we can never force anyone to change their opinion.
All we can do is to pray they find the light at the end of their narrow tunnel.
It's not nice at all hearing people talk trash about my HOME, a place where I grew up.
I hope one day I can be able to show the world how amazing Thailand is, to change people negative opinions, to make them love my Thailand as much as I do.
And that will make me so happy. =)

4. I have bad health. I have alcers stomach, colon...let just say I have the worst digestion system in the world.
I once tried to trade it with a cow cause she had 4 stomach. Of course she refused it!
That is why I stuck with this lousy thing for 24.5 years!
I believe the causes are my mouth and my hands.
The hands put too much bad food in the mouth which open so wide to accept whatever the hands bring. Bad bad mouth!
And I think staying up too late at night may have cause the alcers too.
I need to sleep early. It will help curing ulcers and lose my weight too!

5. The next one is my all time favourite subject...love and relationship.
I had..how many boyfriends..let's see..one in high school...one in..well, that's all I only had one boyfriend in High School which was almost 7 years ago.
Have you ever met anyone who stays single this long? Betcha don't!
I have no idea why I am always see myself holding my own hand on Valentine's, New Year, Christmas and every other holidays.
It is sad...so sad for me who always want 'someone' to be alone.
There were a some guys too you know, guys who try to be my special person.
None of them is right for me. I know they will disappear in a blink of an eye.
It used to bother me so much not being able to find the one for me but I'm better now.
After all only 13 couples find true love each day.
See the oods are too small. I guess my lucky day may never come.
I'm just unlucky in love that's all.

6. After spending around 10 mins trying to write serious stuffs above, I realize one thing, I can't handle them well.
I was restless, up set, frustrated everytime I have to make decision on serious issues like financial thing or career changing for instance.
I can't handle those stuffs at all. Period!
That's why I always tell people that being childish is my biggest flaw.
I need to work on that if I really want advancement in my career.
God! this self-learning thing is hard!

You know what, I think I know now what is the root of all the problems I have...childishness.
I always know I have a naughty little girl inside of me.
I want her cause she helps me get through many dark times.
She always stands by my side when the world seems too big and scary.
She brings my hope back. She makes me believe there are brighter days right ahead of me.
She helps me being an optimist.
But...I am a woman now. (eew!) It is time to wake the woman inside. (If I have one!)
She can't keep hiding behind the little girl anymore.
It's her turn to face the world now.
The girl will always be here to help me looking at all the world in optimistic light.
But when it comes to decision making, career changing, relationship aka. serious stuffs, I will let the grown-up do the job. That's how it should be for a long time.

Anyway, I'm glad I let these out of my system.
Not sure if this will work but how I'm feeling now makes me believe it will be better.
Nothing is too hard to handle.
Today is always worse than tomorrow.

Gotta go now!
Don't worry about me, I have a great life.
Amy =)